Not all pugs are fat. Weenie isn’t.

Life is funny. Downright perverse sometimes. On Facebook, lots of people regard me as a nasty crabby thing. I even got defriended a couple of times last year. But here at home, with the four dogs and a cat, nasty and crabby as some of them can be, I’m the go to guy, the best lap, the one place they never have to explain themselves. Our Scotty doesn’t talk to anyone but me. The deerhound loves his mommy but understands every word I say. The cat has to be on my lap every night. And Eloise, to whom I am intensely allergic, likes nothing better than to be on my hip as close as Elliott.

So she would like you to know that she wishes you all a truly gorgeous and wonderful New Year. [Sneeze sneeze sneeze sneeze]

God bless her.

I am Eloise. I am six. Twice.

And then there’s Rae. Who really is six and owns more of my lap than all of the others combined.

Dog PhDs are smart. They miss the fact that dogs are intelligent. Some of of them Very.