Dogs of the Rings — Part 5, Moria and Mayhem

Galadriel gave everybody a pretty stern talking to, and then she handed out some rations from her personal supply of Brave Biscuits, which everyone enjoyed immensely if a bit sheepishly.

Yum yum. Pippin had two. Because Sam didn't want his.

Yum yum. Pippin had two. Because Sam didn’t want his. Frodo upchucked his.

It was a good thing about the biscuits, though, because almost as soon as they had sallied out, once again, toward Mordor, they ran into a place called Moria.

We're talking very bad place here. Underground, secret passages, and a magical doorway only Gimli could unlock, because... Dwarves.

We’re talking very bad place here. Underground, secret passages, and a magical doorway only Gimli could unlock, because… Dwarves.

Thanks to Gimli the Ring Pack managed to enter the right password — ARF — then they entered a place where thousands of dwarves had been massacred seven or fourteen dog years before.

The early part was very not so good.

The early part was very not so good.

Gandalf was leading the way, munching on Brave Biscuits as if they were Oreos, and he encouraged everyone else not to run screaming back to the entrance.

Gee whiz. Moria's a bitch.

Gee whiz. Moria’s a bitch.

But then things went from bad to worse. There were orcs in there.

Not good. Way not good.

Not good. Way not good.

There was only one way through. It involved a bridge.

 

A not very safe bridge.

A not very safe bridge.

And the orcs were closing in.

Orcs are not nice.

Orcs are not nice.

Even worse, the end of the bridge was blocked by a balrog. Nobody knows what they are exactly, but balrogs make Orcs look like chihuahuas.

Gandalf was not afraid. Much.

Gandalf was not afraid. Much.

So Gandalf attacked.

A wizard unleashed.

A wizard unleashed.

He and the balrog fell into the pit below the bridge. And then nobody knew what to do.

Stay tuned for Part 6.

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