If presidential candidates were dogs…

Well, in no particular order, here are our candidates.

They say I never had a job. Look at me. Is that MY fault?

So I never had a job. Look at me. Is that MY fault?

Servers? Talk to my publicist.

Servers? Talk to my publicist.

Been busy here since I wanted home. Trump called. Couldn't reach the phone from here.

Been busy here since I wented home. That Akita called. Couldn’t reach the phone from here.

Is this Ohio? I do good in Ohio. In Ohio they know I can bite them. Is this Ohio?

Is this Ohio? I do good in Ohio. In Ohio they know I can bite them. Is this Ohio?

If nominated I would run. If elected I would serve.

If nominated I would run. If elected I would serve.

I just fired my communications director and Christ is my savior. Need any help with that French translation?

I just fired my communications director and Christ is my savior. Need any help with that French translation?

Is Mitch mad at me? What did I do now?

Is Mitch mad at me? What did I do now?

I got perfect vision. Perfect. I can see all the way from here to 2020.

I got perfect vision. Perfect. I can see all the way from here to 2020.

Every dog has his day. Maybe only one has his day.