The U.K. and France have caught the lefty American fever to erase unwelcome moments of their history. It is now important to eliminate all triggers that might cause pain to former victims of depredations past.

The man formerly known as Cromwell.

No. 10 Downing Street has announced plans to evict Oliver Cromwell from the Brit historical record. All statues of the evil fundamentalist Christian Usurper will be dynamited, all books and movies about him will be banned and burned. No trace of him is to remain. Meanwhile Northern Ireland is demanding similar treatment for all artifacts and records of the War of Brit Aggression against the I.R.A.

The monster formerly known as Napoleon.

France has announced even more ambitious plans to scoop from the national consciousness all reminders of the French Revolution, the Directorate, and the subsequent genocidal rule of Napoleon Bonaparte. The Tomb of Napoleon will be demolished and transformed into a Muslim park. Moreover, all books about or referring to any of these sorry events will be rounded up and destroyed, as well as such movies and novels that depict any part of these events. Kiss Marlon Brando as Napoleon goodbye. and forget you ever heard about War and Peace or the Count of Monte Cristo. They never existed.

It’s going to be great. And I suspect this is only the beginning.