Finding reasons to root against your own home team

It's got hips and slots and things.

It’s got hips, nips, slits, drawers, and booby things on top. It’s called a Hoosier.

Indiana University has the unpleasant task today of facing Michigan. Ordinarily I would be screaming for the Hoosiers to beat the Wolverines into dust. But no longer.

Now I understand what a sexist and utterly unacceptable name “Hoosiers” is. Take a long look at this.

How dare they insult fat, white, middle-aged housewives from corn country by naming football teams after their kitchen cupboards. I, for one, won’t stand for it.

And I hope you won’t stand for it either. If you are politically correct, you will join with me in insisting that football teams be named after ruthless rodent predators who kill every other mammal they meet in the snows of winter.

Leave the housewives alone. Dammit. This War on Women has to stop. And vote Democrat on Tuesday. Like all good wolverines.

3 comments

  1. Alfa’s avatar

    Are you sure that picture isn’t a Hoover? I could swear someone told me it was a Hoover and the same guy invented the vacuum cleaner.

  2. Tim’s avatar

    Already voted Democrat several times in early voting. So did all the dead people I helped register. Doing my part to elect Jimmy Carter’s seed.

  3. Tim’s avatar

    Though there is still a lot of work to do, hopefully last night’s results lifted your spirits a bit. Even Maryland(!) elected a Republican governor. And I know you’ve talked about it before, but how pathetic is the Democrat party? Who are their big superstars? Barack and Michelle and the slimy Clintons rushing around, stumping for all these people, then being roundly rejected across the nation. And their darling hopeful in Texas was that horrible woman whose only claim to fame is she filibustered for more abortions. Seriously. That was her qualification to govern Texas.

    And do you hear the progs celebrating the female senator from WV or the first black senator from the South since Reconstruction? No, b/c they’re Republicans so it doesn’t count. Soulless, nasty hypocrites, the lot of them.

    Most impressive win to me was Scott Walker in Wisconsin. Why do we keep hearing about losers like Jeb Bush and Mitt Romney running in 2016 and not this guy? He is a fighter and more importantly a WINNER. He’s been in the trenches. He went toe-to-toe with the professional left over the teachers’ union and beat them like a drum. Didn’t panic, didn’t back down, didn’t worry about wanting to reach across the aisle and compromise. Wisconsin is not some sort of deep red state, but he survived a recall election and has now won yet again. That’s the kind of guy I’d like to see run.

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